Yummy!Yummy!Chinese Take Away in Swords

11/04/2026: I don’t usually leave reviews but some of you may get a little giggle out of my cheeky encounter. After seeing reviews that they clamped cars I kept an eye out, but once I seen the staff oh mama! My eyes went googly moogly. I completely forgot about the safety of my vehicle. Tall, pale, handsome, blue eyes, a mustache fit for a saddle. Rough ‘n’ tumble. I ordered the pornstar martini thinking he’d at least take his top off but was sourly disappointed when he didn’t! I was so entranced by this man that my car actually DID get clamped but I saw it similar to a medical clamp, a short discomfort that would lead to prime human optimization. This optimization led me to be able to view my sweet sweet gentleman as he left work and got into a beautiful van. My carriage. Does anybody know who this man is? I’ve been working up the courage to leave this review for a long time now. Xoxo Secret admirer

14/01/2026: Great NYE night out, excellent staff! Came here for New Year's Eve 2025 with my girlfriend and her friends. Good spot for a big night out. The bar staff were surprisingly attentive and friendly, which is rare these days, especially on such a busy night. Big shoutout to the bouncers too. Fair prices for drinks, nice venue with a good setup. The only downside is that it was VERY overcrowded inside. There was a massive line all the way down the road to get in, so you need to get there early on big nights. Overall, a solid night despite the squeeze.